Not what we signed up for in the Amazon!

We landed in Puerto Maldonado at the smallest airport we have seen on this trip. As we walked down the stairs from the plane, Mark took a deep breath, feeling thankful he could breathe easily again, and the rest of us were hit with a wall of heat and humidity. We were definitely in a different climate! We piled into a van, sweaty, with six other people and crossed our fingers that our luggage, thrown on top of the van, would make it to the jungle resort. How it made it is beyond me, as I’m pretty sure they didn’t strap it down, and some of the potholes and construction zones we passed through could have swallowed us whole!

We arrived at the Tranco Tambopata resort, after bouncing around on the dirt roads, all a little sweatier. We started to call our taxi rides ‘South American Massages’ due to the amount of vibrating and deep tissue work we would receive en route. Our guide, Jorge, and the staff greeted us warmly with fresh-squeezed starfruit juice, and we sat down to a full-course lunch. There were only nine of us in the resort when we arrived, and we were all excited for the adventures Jorge had planned for us. We learned we would be going out on a sunset cruise, and had about an hour to check into our rooms and get ready for our first excursion.

It was hot and steamy, and as we expected, the air conditioner was a floor fan. We couldn’t fathom dressing in long pants and long sleeves for our boat ride and night walk, but none of us knew what we were in for as far as the bugs went. We were prepared for anything. I didn’t think to ask if Little Mark had packed an extra set of underwear or not, but I knew Sharon had her purse full of a travelling pharmacy! We had all started to take our Malaria medication, and my tummy was feeling off. Thankfully, a couple of Pepto Bismol and I was as good as gold.

We trekked through the jungle, startled by the thunder in the distance, to the river where Jorge whistled for the boat. As we waited, we could see lightning in the distance. We all wondered if heading out on a boat in the thunder and lightning was a good idea, but we needn’t worry because the boat never showed up. Jorge gave us the "one momento" line and disappeared. He returned shortly after with apologies, as the weather wasn’t safe enough for us to travel. We turned back toward the eco lodge, disappointed and even more sweaty than before, just as the sky opened and it started to pour down rain! We were in the rainforest, baby! We regrouped, had happy hour and settled into a night of games and cards. We decided to tuck into bed early as Jorge had informed us that we needed to meet back at 5:00 am to catch the boat for tomorrow’s excursion. We were supplied with umbrellas to make the short trek to our cabins, and within minutes we were all tucked into our mosquito nets, ready for a good night’s sleep.

Well…. as you have probably guessed… There is going to be more to this story. We had managed to catch every celebration there was on this trip, from opening Carnivale celebrations, parades, birthday parties for lakes…you name it, so why would the Amazon be any different? We were lucky enough to land in during the closing ceremonies for Carnivale. The rain was still pouring, the cracks of lightning and thunder were deafening, and the music was pumping with a repeating, steady bass beat that travelled all the way from town. You would think we would be safe more than 20 km away, but they were “all about the base, ‘bout the base, ‘bout the base, no trouble!!! Meagan Trainor would have been proud. We tossed and turned and had just started to doze off when the power went out. No trouble… the lack of power wouldn’t bother us; we were tucked into bed… until the generator started up. I’d like you all to imagine how peaceful the jungle sounds are, accompanied by lightning, thunder, Johnny Base, the generator… oh and NO FAN, did I mention we were hot?

Four-fifteen arrived very early, and there was no need for an alarm clock for any of us, as we had barely slept. The power was still out, and the nine of us, sleepy and still sweaty, met for our first Rainforest excursion. Our group consisted of the five of us, quickly known as the Canadians, a young couple from the Canary Islands and another couple from the UK. We trekked back through the forest in the dark to the riverbank, making bets as to whether the boat would be there waiting for us.

Again, Jorge whistled, no response… ”one memento” and off he went. When he returned, he told us that the ‘capitan’ had been sleeping as he was up throughout the night bailing out the boat because of the storm. Oh, great, that didn’t sound good! We waited, and waited, mourning the sleep we had lost. Jorge “one momento’d” us again and off he went. Shortly after, we saw a movement upriver. The ‘capitan’ had awakened and was in the boat, then out of the boat, then he was gone. We figured he had crawled back into bed. Finally, he appeared again… in the boat, out of the boat, and then he fell… he was covered in mud. Sharon was giving us the running commentary. It was close to 6:00 am now, and the boat finally pulled up to our dock. We had two flights of stairs down to the riverbed to board the boat. The water was lower than usual, and Jorge had laid a 2x6 across the mud for us to walk on. None of us were pushing to go first; we knew what lurked in that water!!! The young couple from Spain, Luis and Ylenia, offered to lead the way - Go Spain!!

Definitely looking sleepy!!!

This crew looks a little perkier!

The ‘capitan’ covered in mud with one sock on handed us our life jackets, and we set off downriver. We were enjoying the scenery when we noticed the ‘capitan’ was dozing off. He was perched up on the wooden side of the boat with his hand on the throttle… with his EYES CLOSED!! This didn’t just happen once; it happened several times. If he kept that up, he was going overboard. I politely called for Jorge to let him know the ‘capitan’ was asleep, and Sharon was not so subtle. She started clapping to get his attention. Wake up!! Sharon didn’t think this was the time to be polite. One time, we were headed straight for the bank! Jorge was not impressed. We were an hour late getting on the river, and now we were weaving back and forth across the river as our ‘capitan’ was passing out at the ‘wheel’. I’m pretty sure he must have been rocking on with the bass and Megan Trainor at the Carnivale celebrations in town last night. That would explain a lot of things. This Amazonian experience was not what we had signed up for. The ‘capitan’ certainly wasn’t falling asleep in ANY of the videos we had watched to help us choose our Amazon trip. YIKES! Stay tuned for more of our experiences in the Amazon; they do get better. I promise!

The evidence!